5 Tips on How to stop Insecurity in a Relationship

by | Aug 18, 2022

Insecurities in a relationship are like dark clouds in the sky. When you are feeling insecure, it prevents you from experiencing unconditional confidence in your relationship and life. Insecurities in a relationship can affect the way we behave, how we interact and how the entire relationship unfolds. When we are insecure about ourselves or the relationship, our actions and responses are those of unsure people. One insecurity causes another, leading to an event that sets off a series of undesirable outcomes. Some of the world’s most famous and successful people, athletes, artists and celebrities suffer from feelings of insecurity. So if you have insecurities in your relationship you are not alone

Have you ever noticed that insecurities in relationships are from external causes, like being rejected or mistreated? But the truth is, that insecurities come from low self-esteem. There are several signs of insecurities in a relationship .funny enough it may even feel like it’s something right for your relationship. But always look out for these signs of insecurities in a relationship.


Jealousy is an emotion that everyone experiences from time to time. However, a jealous partner will likely make you feel like your every move is being questioned. They may become insecure when other people are around and constantly question who you’re talking to or what you’re doing. Jealousy takes a toll on both parties and is one of the most poisonous behaviours in any relationship.


The first step to healthy arguing is to use productive communication tactics to reach a place of understanding and agreement. The second step, resolving those insecurities that may be creating more conflict than necessary between you and your partner.

Attention Seeking

Another sign of insecurity in a relationship is attention seeking. Trying to start fights is another way of a jalousie.

Insecurities in a relationship
Photo by Julian Myles on Unsplash

How to stop Insecurity in a Relationship

Feeling insecure in a relationship is all about your habits, not your personality. So below are Ways how to change your habits to stop insecurity in your relationship.

Do not Dwell on your Past Relationship Mistake

Being stuck in the past is like being stuck in a maze with no clear exit. if you dwell on your past mistakes it makes it difficult to see your future. Investing quality time and attention to your relationship in the present will help you stop the feeling of any insecurities. Just because you made some big mistakes in a previous relationship doesn’t mean you’re doomed to repeat them again. Just reflect on the lessons learned from your mistakes, so that you can move forward into your new relationship with wisdom, grace and compassion.

If there is something in your past that you find difficult to let go of. Consider how much time and energy you’re spending on those thoughts. Chances are that if you spent that same amount of time focusing on your current relationship. It would blossom into something beautiful. It is important to invest in your relationship with your partner so that it continues to grow and thrive. If you don’t invest enough into the present relationship, it could end up failing as well. It is good to think about past relationship mistakes and learn from them rather than keep dwelling on the past.

Meet Each other’s Needs

You deserve to be loved and to feel connected, respected and valued in a relationship. When you’re feeling insecure in a relationship. It can sometimes be a sign that some of your needs are not being met. Your insecurity is often a reflection of your lack of emotional connection with your partner. And is due to the fact that you’re lacking the self-esteem and security that comes from feeling loved. There are six basic human needs that affect every single person on the planet. Which are Certainty ,Variety ,growth,connection,significance ,contribution. These needs are ranked differently between every. So if you are in a relationship you need to check if all these basic needs are met. When your needs are met or that of your partner it increases self-confidence and reduces insecurities in a relationship.

how to fix insecurities in a relationship
Photo by AllGo – An App For Plus Size People on Unsplash

Act like a New Couple

Dating is a special time of your life. It’s the beginning of something new and the overwhelming desire to protect and care for your partner. When you’re in the early stages of a new relationship, the energy is electrifying. You want to learn everything about your partner and be physically close to them whenever possible. After some time the relationship fire starts to fade away. The time it takes for your romance to fade can vary, depending on the couple. For some people, it may occur within a few months; others take years. As a relationship matures, the partners often experience insecurities. This can happen when your partner feels that you’re no longer making an effort or that your attraction has faded.

See also  9 Emotional Needs to Think Through in Relationships

Bring back the passion in your relationship and act like you did when you started dating. It’s easy to forget how it feels to be completely head-over-heels for your significant other. But try to awaken the feeling by organizing a beautiful surprise Dinner. Act like it’s the first time you are seeing your partner. Write them small love notes and keep them somewhere your partner can see them. This will increase the love and passion in your relationship and help stop insecurities in your relationship.

Practice Self Compassion

The more you try to avoid feeling anxious about a relationship, the more anxious you feel. Relationship anxiety can be a source of shame and a major source of self-criticism. It’s also one of the primary reasons that people don’t make relationships work they feel too anxious. When you feel anxious in your relationship it makes you start criticizing your own self. Self-criticism prevents you from seeing the good in your personality. And makes you feel worse about yourself. Criticizing yourself for what you did wrong is a habit that will undermine your sense of well-being. And this feeling of low self-esteem or low self-confidence can cause insecurity in a relationship.

To counteract this habit practice self-compassion. Self-compassion is about being kind and understanding with yourself when you’re struggling. It’s a skill we already have, but sometimes we don’t use it. But research shows that self-compassion is actually a much more positive way to deal with life’s challenges than criticism or negativity. So when you start practising self-compassion you will feel more confident in all aspects of your life including your relationship.

Dealing with insecurities in a relationship
Photo by Khamkéo Vilaysing on Unsplash

Stop Asking for Reassurance

When you’re feeling insecure, it’s perfectly natural to want reassurance that this is a good relationship. But get ready for some bad news: Plenty of studies have shown that trying to get your partner to reassure you by asking “Do you love me?” or “Do you still find me attractive?” can backfire. That’s because once a question like this pops up, the person being asked starts worrying about whether he or she answered truthfully and if it seems too harsh or meaningful. This can make your partner even less likely, to be honest with you at a time when you need the truth!

Most of us love being reassured, but it can get old if you’re constantly asking for reassurance. Being insecure often leads to asking for reassurance. When your partner fails to give that reassurance, they may feel awkward about it, making them more resentful. This leads to the two of you having more arguments about it, which makes everyone more insecure. Asking for reassurance seems like an innocent request so often that you don’t realize how much it’s hurting your relationship. While you need to lean on your partner for emotional support, don’t expect them to be your only support. You need to be their sauce of support as well. Even if it’s not bad to ask your partner for updates about you. Don’t make it a habit to depend on their reassurance you can assure yourself that you are the best partner for your significant order.

Hope you enjoyed this article and you can identify the insecurities in your relationship and fix them before it has a hold of your relationship .thank you for reading and if you wanna see more relationship related post click Here

Author Profile

Hi there, I'm Yekum Ane and I'm a dedicated skincare coach who is passionate about educating people on the importance of skin awareness through healthy eating. I firmly believe that maintaining healthy eating habits and following simple skincare tips can help us all achieve great skin without putting in too much effort. Let me guide you on your journey to healthier, more beautiful skin!